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Nathan is Hebrew and means "gift from God" - we couldn't have been more blessed than to have been chosen as his parents!

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Thursday, October 9, 2008

You can pick your friends...

You've heard it before - you can pick your friends but not your family.

This story begins at my first board meeting of the Ds Resource Center. I was informed by a mother of a daughter with Ds about what she believes our future holds. She said that we would "lose" friends now that we have Nathan and I should be prepared for it. I couldn't believe it. That thought never crossed my mind - ever. I asked her why? She said that some people simply can't handle being around a child with Down syndrome. When I came home I told Danny what was said and how surprised I was to hear that - I have friends with children that have special needs and I've never felt embarrassed to invite them to into my home or felt uncomfortable in their presence. But, that's us.

Danny and I made our predictions but so far it hasn't happened. Maybe that's because Nathan is a baby. Maybe as he gets older things will change. What I do know is that those people who are embarrassed by my son and can't handle being around us were never our friends to begin with and our family will be better off without them. See Ya!

4 comments:

Shari said...

Very well said! We have lost a few friends due to Curtis, but in our opinion they weren't true friends to begin with. Exactly what you stated! Also, I have made some headway with Social Security and getting benefits for Curtis. His mental health dx do count for disability, but not SSI. The coordinator for our local mental health agency is going to go with me with all of Curtis's records to help me! Because of your leading things could be coming to fruition. I appreciate you!

Terry Family said...

I am so glad to hear this!!! Way to go!!! Never give up Shari!!!

mariade2 said...

I have many acquaintances and a few friends. The friends I have, I believe I'll pretty much have for life. I believe this because to me it is not just a title to be given -- it is one to be earned. The reason being is that we love our friends - they are extended family. As you point out, family we 'picked.'

We don't necessarily walk around saying, 'you are my friend,' 'you are an acquaintance.' However, we find that out through different ventures throughout the relationship. Sometimes others are not strong enough to be your friend. That's okay, at least they bailed rather than bring you down.

Strong enough,
Ree

Lianna said...

I have to admit that two sets of friends that we had prior to Gabe being born truly disappointed us afterward. It is not such a great loss though because what we've gained in compassion and understanding as parents far outweighs are need to please.