I've been stressing out lately about sending Nathan to preschool when he's three and he's only 19 months old (almost)! Isn't that silly?
I'm beginning to become concerned because Nathan's used to being home with me and placing him into such an unfamiliar environment for any length of time is terrifying for me to think about. I'm afraid of what the world holds for him and how he'll be received (without me). He's safe at home and free from ridicule.
While talking to another mom, who also happens to have a daughter with the same designer genes, I told her that if Nathan didn't have Down syndrome he would be going to preschool ~ no questions asked. She said, "then you have to send him." She's right. I treat Nathan just like I would any other child and this is no different. My greatest fear is not being there for him if he needs me. Even typing this is difficult for me ~ just thinking about it makes me sick to my stomach. I can't protect him from everything in the world and I need to let him learn and play with the other kids. It's another crossroads in the world of tough decisions that are not easy to make.
What I've decided to do is ease Nathan into being away from me ~ ok I'm easing myself into it too. I'm going to try and find a program where Nathan can just play with kids for a few hours a few days a week beginning in the fall. Not a program for children with special needs (which would be free) but a traditional setting where he can interact with all types of children without mommy. I'm not sure where that's going to be but I'll figure it out. If we start now by the time he's three we'll both be prepared for a few days of preschool a week (not everyday).
I just can't believe that Nathan is old enough for me to be making these sorts of decisions. Time really goes so fast!